The above title is a common occurrence in Pakistani society which means “How others will perceive you through their own indulgences and adjudications”. Now, you people will be thinking around why am I using this sentence? Let me tell you, this sentence is the psychological executioner for all the people who want to entertain, perform, and achieve something in their lifespan. Unfortunately, this sentence has murdered thousand of reveries for many people in Pakistan. Correspondingly, this sentence has a disastrous influence on women.
If you analyse and put this finding implication on the scale you will undeniably notice that it is considerable denser in women than men. Most of the time a woman has to face this immense psychological barrier to move on in her life. Society is made up of two protagonists ‘men and women. Therefore, we have a different set of obligations defined by our Society. If you compare both these protagonists in the context of the above title, you will examine an absolute disparity.
Generally, we can experience numerous events in our lives and hear such daunting sentences. For a woman, there is demarcated conventional way and standard of living. A woman has to operate in certain cultural limitations. Whenever they repel, they have to face something worse. However, the response sometimes comes as coercive and sometimes as a reward. Likewise, there are also some predefine obligations and normative roles for a woman. For instance, a girl has to sponge the dishes, launder the clothes, cook, Broom the floor etc. All of these are socially created duties and roles that every woman has to perform. Whenever any women act and contemplate something out of the box, she faces these sorts of obstructions, people become so hypercritical about her.
This “log kya Kahengy gain?” sentence is not only restricted outside women’s family but it also exists in the family. In most of the epochs when a woman finds a job, she immediately twitches thinking about her family. She ponders how her family will retort to her job news. this can be considered as the initial psychological barrier a woman faces. The level of gender discrimination and the reaction of the family varies from folks to folks and households to households. Customarily, depends on the status, class, caste, and modernism of the Society, community, and family. I have witnessed many girls whose dreams are suppressed by their own family members. Such as “you are a girl”, “A girl looks good when she is inside her home” But there are many exemptions in Pakistani society as well.
People think differently, every human believes in rationality, human think what is beneficial for him/her. There are also people who permit their women to work outside irrespective of any conventional barriers. For instance, 23 years old Dua Khan from Shaamnagar started a minor business of fast food to support her family due to poverty. she expressed herself to the reporter about the malicious and dampen reaction of the local and visitors. People started bantering her and were so investigative about her character.
I believe, this decree of judgment creates a blockade irrespective of Gender but, I cannot disagree with the facts that it has damaged woman/girl more than Man/boy. Generally, families are extra cautious about their daughters because they know one single mistake can open the road to criticism and malicious judgments. Furthermore, if any girl or boy tries to make his own decisions in life, they are mostly disallowed and decisions are frequently overruled due to naivety and ingenuousness. These parental and societal perspectives certainly kill the aptitude and inventiveness for women and men.
In women’s case, usually, parents are their career counsellors. Their parents opt what their kids should become, let’s say, a for a girl the appropriate job in most cases is teaching, what if she wants to become a mechanic? Even, if she opposes teaching and asks for a mechanical career, the answer will be “Log kya kahengy gain?”. Nevertheless, I must say there are exclusions. Some people believe that opposing their own kid’s determination in career development is suicidal for them.
Written by: Shah Fahad